Monday, April 03, 2006

"I'M THE LUCKIEST CAT IN THE WORLD" HUGH HEFNER

ASADENA, Calif. — Hugh Hefner knows he’s the luckiest man in the world. Many other men think he is, too. But I think he actually has it rough. He lives in a house with virtually no privacy. I can’t even imagine what it takes to find a free bathroom.
During the past year, Hef has had cameras following him around as E! filmed The Girls Next Door, about his dessert tray of girlfriends.
He has — at least — three: Bridget, 32; Holly, 26; and Kendra, 20.
Last week, they, plus seven other bunnies for good measure, turned out to support their show at a party on the winter press tour.
Hefner plopped down on a white couch in a reserved indoor cabana at the Ritz-Carlton while his burly bodyguards fended off the media.
See? The guy can’t even get some quality quiet time with his loved ones.
Hef told me that filming the show is fun but that, unlike other people on reality shows, he has ‘‘a real life."
‘‘I have a lot of other stuff I have to do," Hef said.
Keeping track of birthdays and bra sizes alone must eat up weeks.
Despite being in the porn business, Hef draws the line.
‘‘This isn’t an X-rated show," he noted without a trace of sadness.
At least he gets a little alone time. But then the next minute he is changing from the lounging robe to the going-out robe.
The man’s nearly 80! Although my grandmother continued to travel the world at 80, we never once made her go clubbing.
I asked whether season two of the show would focus on the same girls, and Hef was almost indignant at the implication that he might swap one out. Hef, apparently, believes in monogamy. Or is it polygamy?
My head hurts.
As I sat next to him on the white couch, he devoted his full attention to a bowl of ice cream. I almost felt bad for not wearing a low-cut shirt. (Not that I could compete with the girls or the ice cream.)
The group stayed at the party until almost 10 p.m., sharing intimate moments in their heavily guarded cabana and possibly discussing the delicate situation in the Middle East.
Then it was time for Hef and the 10 hot chicks to leave — finally, some time to themselves.
Yes, being Hugh Hefner sure is tough.

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